Archive for January, 2012

TYPOO’S ARE A BIRCH

Posted: January 27, 2012 in Madness
Tags: , , , , ,

“Typoo” definition: when you make so many typo’s that you get a mega-ton of shit for being an illiterate idiot.  Hey, World, shut your fuck-hole!  I may not have ever gone to school or read a book or know what a “math” is, but I know something about blogging.  You just blog it.  That’s it!  So, if you’re gonna criticize me and my inability to know how to spell shit, well, then sir or madam, I’m gonna take it up with the internet.  They don’t take kindly to dick weasels with superiority complexes and will text the shit outta you with nonsensical gibberish words in place of real words!

Oh, yeah, World.  Daddy ain’t pulling punches.

And furthermore, if you don’t start pulling your weight and stop trying to kill everybody all the time, I’m gonna kick you in your global junk.  Over and over again.  And there ain’t shit you can do about it!  You’re a fucking globe!

“Seismic” whatnow?

Are you fucking kidding me, World?  You can do that?

You win.  I’m sorry.  My bad.  You just keep on spinnin’ and I’ll just keep on making typoo’s.

BALL & CHAIN (2011)

Posted: January 6, 2012 in Film
Tags: , , , , , ,

“Ball & Chain” was a fun little concept conceived, written, and directed by my good friend Phil Haney.  Having worked with him on a few other things, he thought I would be good for the role of Ben.  So, he sent over the script, I read it, and, of course, agreed to do it.  Otherwise, this would’ve been a very short blog entry.

Any who, we shot this back in April and much like any other short project at this level, it had its hiccups.  But several months and a vat of elbow grease later, the project is finally done.  The concept is that of a married couple who’s been kidnapped by some deranged killer and locked in his (or her) basement.  But instead of following the killer and his horrible exploits, we stay with the couple, who continue to carry on with normal relationship-type banter.  The two extremes, juxtaposed against one another, is where the dry humor derives from.

So, without further adieu, here is BALL & CHAIN, in it’s entirety.

Episode 1:  The Stove

Episode 2:  Mouth Noise

Episode 3: The Break-up